Oh, and I should remind my me that my kids didn’t spend every weekend in their 20’s closing Crobar at 5:05AM with a sweat-drenched shirt and a head full of whatever like dad did.
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This is the way.
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THIS is the way
I am such a wet blanket.
“Did dad get you into –”
No.
“How do you get your kids –”
You don’t.
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@Dicky11 didn’t mention their childrens’ genders.
But yes, some girls like beats. Some like guitars, or singing. Some don’t like music-making at all, and that’s all ok.
a bit off topic
I don’t think your comment was meant in bad faith, but framing music as something that girls/women are only interested to through boys/men and romance is inherently misogynistic. And that’s discouraging to read as a woman on a generally welcoming forum.
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I thought about linking the threads together 
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I think just having instruments around that they can try some when they don’t feel any pressure is the way.
I have either been playing guitar, or I started getting into synthesis when my oldest was pretty young, but there’s always been instruments or music around since they were very small. And thankfully for me sometime last year, they both wanted to start piano lessons when they were offered at their schools. I asked them if they want to try it out and they said yes. (And I’ve been reading their lesson books too!)
There’s been time when I’m practicing on a instrument that they just want to try naturally.
That feels great, but I also don’t want to ever force them to do it like it’s a mandate or homework.
Maybe just having ways that kids can express themselves available. Drawing painting, music games. Just support what they’re into. They’re all different.
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My kids (now grown) are excellent pianists and violinists. Why? Because they saw their mother and me banging away on the piano, and start on viola and cello. They saw us listen to music, really listen. We took them to concerts and the opera, and then asked them if they wanted more. They asked for lessons; they could have quit. One of us was always present; we changed teachers if we saw it wasn’t working. They wanted to do fewer festival competitions; fine with us. (Not fine with the teachers, but that was their problem.)
I don’t think you can impose values on your kids. That never worked for me and my parents. It just hurt. You can show them your values, and explain why you think they’re important. They will choose. They will think of things you never did. At times, you find yourself learning from them.
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That sounds like excellent parenting.
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It’s the Golden Rule applied to kids. Do unto your children what you wish your parents had done unto you.
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similar to my experience with my dad, he always tried to force his hobbies like fishing and model planes on me and I really hated it, I mean sure I could go on a trip occasionally but he was getting mad when I “wasn’t taking it seriously”…
all I wanted is sitting hours on my impulse tracker making sound come out of my logitech speakers, which he hated and always gave me shit about.
I hope I can spark some interest of what I like to do but definitely not going to force it.
I can relate. I was a comics/video game/music nerd and my dad was a car/hunting/competitive shooter type. The only way her would really spend time with me as a kid would be if I went to the shooting range with him. He learned later in life that he should have shown more interest in my interests with me and has apologized in my young adult years. But it still has an impact on the nature of our relationship all this time later.
Ha! Thank you.
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Ah but I sometimes wish my parents pushed music onto me. I was largely an athlete instead. I’ll always remember one of the guys from daft punk saying in an interview that his parents made him take guitar lessons when he didn’t prefer to and is now thankful they did. Believe me please, I don’t push music or really much onto my kids. We are past that and mostly just trying to get their eyes and brains (and souls) away from tic tok and video games.
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It is really a fine line to walk. There are times when you think a bit of weight on the scales will make a difference. Sometimes you are right; sometimes you are wrong. I know many people whose parents made them take piano lessons. Some of them even got quite good at it, but as soon as they could, they stopped, and never played again. It is better if it isn’t an ideological decision on the part of the parents, but one born from passion, and yet even that does not suffice. I think it must be organic, it must constantly be reassessed, and there needs to be the right amount of distance and perspective. Not easy.
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You’re no wet blanket. You’re a warm soft blanket. Cheers.
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I encourage my kids (3 and 6) to play instruments several times a week. I play and practice daily and don’t want my obsession to seem intimidating. So I encourage them to play and experiment with my own instruments. I hand them my synths, drums, pianos, guitars, harmonicas, flutes, etc., and I let them play. I shut up when they play. I only listen. When my 6-year-old son asked me what I thought of his piano banging, I told him it was beautiful, and I liked how he expressed himself. I commented on something specific (because I was listening) and let him experiment. My 3-year-old likes to move the knobs and faders of my synths. I let her do that whenever she wants. She likes to sit at the drums and make me laugh with her loud noises.
I try to give them the best time around musical instruments. So far, we’re still making noise and having fun.
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My daughters only 6 but since she was literally a baby she’s been around synths and drum machines, I’ve always let her play with them with me whenever she’s wanted to and I don’t tell her what to do or not to do, I don’t explain much to her unless she asks or shows interest. She sees my passion for synthesizers and for electronic music she knows I’m synth crazy and she is constantly exposed to a very wide range of electronic music, all that together has her interested though she’s kind of over the wow factor that a synth brings when you first get your hands on one she does still retain a bit of interest mostly because of my passion for it and her curiosity in anything I’m into. I don’t know if she’ll retain that interest when she gets old enough to be into stuff. But she does things randomly like she’ll hum or sing a melody that she makes up to me and tells me it’s her idea for a new song or that I should use it in a song so I feel like I’ve laid the groundwork pretty strong if she chooses to become a musician.
I can’t offer exact advice because every kid is different but I can say that allowing them to fully play with whatever gear they want to is a big deal obviously with supervision when they’re really young but not like hovering over them telling them not to touch this or that or boring her with explaining the ins and outs of gear unless they ask something specific. Also the gear you show them matters, Shes always enjoyed patching my eurorack lots of blinky lights and very hands on, same with all my Elektron boxes, punching in steps on a step sequencer and hearing what happens is always fun for a kid, keyboard based synths are probably not as exciting I imagine just because of their presentation it looks more like a piano something where pressing the keys is the main attraction and until they understand a couple of basics they don’t get results by turning random knobs and pressing random buttons which is what they likely want to do at first. The theremin is always a big hit with kids too, also like someone mentioned give them a microphone and some effects and they’ll be into it usually, anything with a vocoder too. Think about gear that had an immediate wow factor for little humans with very short attention spans and you’ll be on the right track other than that I would emphasize exposing them to lots and lots of different kinds of music that is based off of electronic instruments, play for them what you love and let them see your passion for it and it will either stick or it won’t, my daughter loves old school Jungle, UK garage/bassline and hardstyle/jump style I also play some of my other favorites like Radiohead and Air and I listen to a lot of Phonk when we’re driving. She knows how much I love music and art she played the Radiohead art/music exhibit on PS5 for well over an hour on her own and that was after sitting with me and watching me explore it for an hour before that and she understood that there were a lot of complex emotions involved in the work which surprised me in a good way.
There’s stuff I listen to that she loves stuff she likes and then other stuff not so much.
If you raise a music lover then you have the potential to raise a musician but ultimately it’s their choice but you can help them develop taste in what’s good and equally important when music is bad and why they may agree or disagree but it’s the discussion and passion about it that I feel is important.I don’t plan on pushing hee interest is making music much unless she shows a natural talent for it at some point she can experience it through seeing and hearing what I’m up to and that experience may spark a true interest in making music some day I really hope it does but more than that I want her to love and appreciate music though her life as much as I do if I’ve done that and that’s as far as it goes with her then I’m still happy
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great thread. think the core advice is pretty clear.
when some kids become self aware they want to be an individual separated from their parents lives/passions.
got me thinking about the music exams and concerts i was told i had to do.
a few good and empowering memories of playing at festivals/concerts in large groups.
but no memory storage/positive recollection of exams i had to take.
I wonder how it would have impacted my outlook if i was told to play what i wanted when i felt like it rather than “you haven’t practised!/learn this piece you don’t like and make sure you can play it well so you get to grade 4”.
i think simplicity is key. Also, not forcing it on the kids. Ask them if they want to play with the synthesizers. If yes then go to town.
some winning recipes have been:
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OP-1, kids are just drawn to it. my 4 year old loves sampling his own voice and playing it back. i find my 9 year old sitting with it from time to time with headphones on and just zoning out, its fantastic to witness.
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prepatched modular - this can be scary for younger kids though since alot of harsh sounds can be produces depending on. But they are often fascinated with plugging in cables into new inputs, i usuallly let them plug the cables as they see fit even if they happen to plug it to a output instead of input.
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OT - Vocals set up a flex track and have a mic run into OT and let the kids sing and dabble with the fader.
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Omnichord - its on repairs now but the little amount of time it was in our home the kids loved playing with it. its a tactile interface which i find my kids really respond to.
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