Yeah, existential artistic crisis a few years back.
My solace is saying “I’m defining my workflow” and/or “I’m creating my performance interface” which are both technically true, but also a bit of ‘hiding’ from putting what’s in my brain into something more than just a few noodling loops in a DAW at the dining room table.
My muse is neurodivergent and keeps taking me away from anything anyone else can relate to.
Your job is to create. It’s the audience’s job to judge. So create and set it free. By the time anyone else is judging it you should already be bringing your next creation to life, and thus never worrying about what a critic says.
For me it has more to do with the fact that I know the process behind my music, so the mystique is gone. I love that sense of htf did they do that when I listen to music.
I think that’s why I love Bon Iver so much their music is riddled with mystique and equally Aphex Twin.
We all spend time.
Whether creating stuff using time to do it or listening to stuff that takes time to do.
You could use time making stuff that no one else spends time listening to or using time to listen to someone who wasted their time making something that’s not worth listening to.
Who cares? Get on with either of those pursuits and time is the only victim.
Who that time supposedly has been spent by is irrelevant and a waste of time speculating over.
You wasted time reading that or did I waste time writing it?
I personally dislike a great part of mainstream music.
But i enjoy so much some others that i would not even compare both.
I think the intention is important. We can hear a music made for $ or from the heart/guts/mind. Sometimes, with luck or else, the latter joins the first one.
I’d leave adjective like « better », « bad », etc. to sport. It is not a competition here. Business of music is but Making music is not (yet).
I’ve also seen a LOT of people defining themselves as musicians or artists and full of confidence. All i’d say is that for the most they replaced work by confidence.
I like to remind this circle at times:
Oh that’s nice -> actually it’s pretty great -> well that’s not that amazing -> it’s crap -> i’m crap -> oh that’s nice…
The trick being to know each step will pass by and that working hard and enjoying it allows to shorten the transitions and to not stay stuck in one of the step.
Finally i’ll say the best musicians i met stay in their bedroom. The others go to the world to present their work and get some critics. Only these ones will evolve, there’s no place/state/status to reach at the end of the journey. Better enjoy the trip!